Moment of weakness

Loneliness making me weak
Making me turn to you

I'm looking for something...
Asking you for something...

You don't even respond
You only want what you want
No care for me - my needs - my heart

Breaking again,
Feelings of worthlessness

But no...

Those are lies

I can stop this cycle
It's in my power to say no

This is not my story

My Searching Heart

Where is home?

A place to land
A place to feel safe
A place to feel loved
A place to feel accepted

Always searching...

Home in my Father
Resting in His Peace
Learning His Love
Learning His Depth

then the doubts, the fears, the loneliness come and cause my heart to search once again.

Trust - Faith

Come to Me
Piece by Piece - Restoration

Restless Heart - when will you allow yourself to heal?

Chaos to Beauty...

the chaos in my life
has been a badge I've worn
though I have been torn
I will not be moved...
Natalie Grant

This song hit me in a different way this morning.

the chaos in my life
has been a badge I've worn

I've worn the mess, the ugliness, the chaos in my life as a badge...
I've earned it.
I've been through hell.

Lost what my life was
Lost friends
Lost myself

I've cried.
I've talked about it
I've grieved
I've mourned

Time to see the beauty.
Time to see me.

The joy
The free spirit
The future I have

What is God up to in my life?

the adventure awaits...

Time to move on.

The Back and Forth

The back and forth

The push and pull

I want you

I don't want you

I desperately need you

I can't stand you

I want you to stay.

When will you finally leave?

My heart had no place to land

My heart had no home

My victorious heart beaten

lost

thrown away

tossed aside

Broken...torn...damaged

Trying to piece it back together

Always searching...

Where can my heart land?

Where is a safe place?

I know where my safety lies.

My head knows...my heart still doesn't trust.

I know Who longs to hold my heart and treasure it.

I know Who desires my love above all else.

I know the lengths He goes to show His love.

When will I trust?

When will I believe?

when will I allow my heart go to the One Who created it?